Getting Personal

For my last post of 2016, I want to say thank you to those of you who have been so faithful in reading my blog.  It has been a year of ups and downs for me, but thankfully I follow Jesus, who is always the same. I hope you have had a great year of getting to know Jesus on a more personal level and that you continue to grow your relationship with Him, as I plan to do.  I currently do not plan to post daily during 2017, but may post some things here and there.  We shall see where the Lord leads. Blessings to you all!

Living in Jesus

Looking ahead to 2017, what does it hold? I'm not a fan of a New Year's Resolution, so that's not something I'm referring to here. I'm thinking more along the lines of the type of expectancy I am living with. I don't have particular expectations of 2017, as I've learned from my past that these don't keep me very positive. I do, however, live with the expectancy that God will move and is moving. I know He is, has been, and will be faithful in 2017 and there is a part of me that loves the thought of what He might do.  I have no idea, but I will wait in anticipation of how He will grow our relationship. It's going to be a great year living in Jesus!

Being Blessed

I'm ending my year of blogging in a similar way to its start. I've been thinking about relationships and how long it takes to build strong, solid relationships.  Part of my reason for blogging this year was to set aside a time for myself to work on my relationship with God, to spend time with Him each day. Blogging has definitely given me that opportunity.  I hope you have found a way to spend time each day with Jesus and have gotten to know Him better this year too.  I've found that when I spend that time with Him, I want to come back each day to sit with Him. Getting near is the real meaning of being blessed and I have been blessed this year.

His Silence

Sometimes God is silent. It's as if He is giving me the opportunity to think through something for myself. It's difficult for me. I have found that the hardest part of God's silence is continuing to spend time with Him. However, that's exactly what I need to do when God is silent, spend time with Him.  I sit in a quiet place, invite Him to be with me, and enjoy the time alone with Him. I know He is always present, even if He isn't saying anything.  It's kind of like it's our quality time together. I have to admit, it's a challenge though, to sit in silence with the Creator. If I push through though and I stick it out, these are the most soul-filling times I have.  I guess it's more that God knows what I need when I need it, including His silence.  

**A tip for you if you are trying to spend silent time with God...I play music with no lyrics so my mind can relax, or I focus on my breathing and heart beat with ear plugs in.  I am super distractible, so sometimes I need something for my mind to focus on, otherwise I think of all sorts of other things and don't actually spend time with God.

Simply Seek God

I spend time talking to God, having conversations back and forth. This morning, I realized I was using God's responses as if He were a giant 8 ball.  Ya know what I'm talking about? The 8 ball that had the weird gel and cube in it that you asked questions, flipped it over, and got your answer? Well, that's kind of how I was handling God, and I was a bit convicted by it. I like to ask God questions, and I like when He gives me His answers, for the most part, but sometimes I find I'm seeking answers more than God.  Here's what I learned this morning. When asking questions of God, His response is so much more than an answer. The journey to the answer is more important than the final landing spot.  Meaning, when I ask God if something particular is going to happen, I need to focus more on the journey of getting to the particular ending. It's not the end that matters, it's the time spent with God getting there. I've learned so much more on the journey than I've learned at a destination. When I seek answers from God, I need to simply seek God, only then will I gain all that He intends for me.

It's Unpredictable

As an educator, the end of the year is winding down, but the school year is not quite half over. It feels funny to think about ending the year, when my year revolves more around the school calendar.  However, I do count this as a time of year when I can reflect on the past and look to new beginnings. 2016 has been less than I thought it would be.  There are still things lingering that I had thought would have been resolved. There are things undone that I had thought would have been completed. That's what I find difficult about a new year. Life is unpredictable. I make all of these really fantastic plans, but I never know what's actually coming down the pike. I'm okay with that. The unpredictability will not stop me from planning nor does it make me feel hopeless.  If anything, it makes me more excited about what God is doing.  Even though 2016 has not been what I anticipated, there has been much movement from God.  I don't know what 2017 has in store, but it's coming and I have someone bigger in my life than any plans I can lay. Here's to ending well in 2016.

A Christmas Prayer

Father, my prayer this Christmas is for you to become real in the lives of those who need you. May hearts be softened and ears be opened to your Word. Father, search us and know us. Bring us to a place where you are the only thing we need and our joy can be made complete. Amen.

Give Him Room

The birth of one baby set the world upside down. The name of Jesus has power. There was no one like him before he came and there has been no one like him since.  Makes sense, He was God on the planet. This Christmas I hope those who are celebrating the season, give Jesus a room in their inn. I hope we find a way to open a space to let Him come in just a little closer so we can get a glimpse of life in His glory. May your Christmas be filled with the glory of God. May you experience His power and grace as you walk your journey with Him. Have a blessed Christmas, my friends!

Let Jesus Loose

I'm always encouraged by the giving spirit I see in people during the month of December. People are kind and caring. They put others first to make them happy through a gift with thoughtful intent. This is the spirit of Christmas, giving. I wonder why we only seem to be able to do this during December. Would it be possible to have this spirit of giving throughout the year? It is a selfless act, to give, and if we can entertain the idea of giving all year, what would that look like? Does it always need to be in the form of a present? My challenge for myself in the coming year is to give more, not presents necessarily, but to look for ways I can do selfless acts of love for those around me...Let Jesus loose in my world. It could be beautiful!

Jesus and Mom

I've been thinking about Mom these last couple of weeks. It's crazy how in this third go around of Christmas without her, I've seemed to miss her more. I think that's the thing with people being gone. You expect them to be around again sometime, but they just won't be. I know Mom is celebrating in Heaven and my missing her is more for my own sake than hers.  There are just things I want to share with her and moments I wish she could be a part of here on Earth.  I do believe she sees the good things that are going on with us, but that's not really what it's about.  It's about hearing her voice, or seeing her smile, or feeling her fingers run through my hair during a haircut in the kitchen. It's her physical presence that I miss.  There was an incredible way about her that was simply in her presence...it was Jesus in her.  I hope I am the same for someone as Mom was for me. I want Jesus to be with me as He was with her on Earth.  That is my goal, to be one with Jesus where you can't tell where one of us ends and the other begins.  I think that's how it was with Jesus and Mom.

His Strength, Joy, and Peace

My week/weekend of singing is catching up with me.  I'm tired and I'm getting what seems to be a cold. However, this isn't affecting my excitement, anticipation, and joy for this coming weekend.  I'm glad that when these kinds of days hit, where I'm tired and just want to crash, God in me is my strength to go forward. I'm living in His strength, joy, and peace these days.  It feels lovely!

God Is With Us

My heart is wrapped up in the ups and downs of life. The joy that some get to experience in receiving good news, and the sorrow that others feel in receiving the not so good news. This time of year is filled with joy and excitement and yet for some that's not how it's going. The world is real and it doesn't stop for our individual circumstances. Here is what I know, out of my own experience. There is joy in sorrow and there can be laughter through tears. All of this is possible because of a baby who was born in Bethlehem. Jesus brings joy in our lives and fills us to the point of overflowing. Of course there are moments when we hurt and cry tears of sadness, but in the midst of the deep pain, the love of the Savior brings something that nothing on Earth can describe. There is deep peace that is given through the Holy Spirit. No flailing in the sorrow. No anger in the pain. Only soul deep satisfaction through the One who became flesh. Emmanuel, God with us, in all of life, joy and sorrow. Whatever you are experiencing during this Christmas season, I pray that you find the One who was born in a manger, died on a cross, raised from the dead, and ascended into Heaven to give us the gifts of love, redemption, hope, and freedom. Come, Lord Jesus, come.

Glory Revealed

As I head into this last week before Christmas, I sit with a thankful heart. I don't know that there are words to express, or even brain power to think of, all of the things that come to mind during this holiday.  It is my favorite.  God bestows so many different gifts at this time of year, through activities, giving, relationships, visuals, sounds, and, yes, food. ;-) I once said that I couldn't do Christmas if it happened in June. I really do feel that way. There is something about the cold weather with the snow on the ground that causes me to become contemplative and makes the season more real. There is hardship that comes along with Christmas, as we battle the elements, that brings something about the Christmas story to life.  There was nothing easy about the way Jesus was born, and yet the glory of God was revealed.  I'm reminded that no matter my circumstances, I walk with Jesus and I get to see His glory. I am more than a conqueror through Christ, and Christmas, with all of its traditions, is a time when God reveals His glory anew each year.

Prayer

Father, I thank you for the gifts and blessings you have bestowed. Your graciousness and care you have shown in the way you have cared for me over and over is beyond compare. Your love is abounding in the time of year and I pray that you would continue to walk closely to me. I need you. Amen.

Seek Jesus

Dalton and I were discussing the importance of having people around you. It's great to have support from people and rejoice with each other. Our conversation, though, quickly turned to how important it is to have that strong, solid relationship with Jesus Christ because sometimes you will be all alone.  The battle will be within you, or will only involve you. If you only involve other people in your world and forget to include Jesus, then you will truly find yourself alone. When you live in Christ and you cultivate that relationship with Him, you will find that even when the battle is only you, you are never alone. Don't think it won't happen to you. We will all face the final battle "alone" (I'm referring to the end of life), at which point, it is just you and God. We will find ourselves walking that path alone, unless we have been walking with Jesus.  Take care of that, my friends.  Life is too uncertain to walk without knowing Jesus. Invite Him into your life today, if you haven't already.  And if you have, spend time getting to know Him.  I don't ever want anyone to be alone in any battle.   Seek Jesus.

Share the Love

I'm reminded today of the importance of sharing your love with those you love. I'm not always so great about speaking out the words that express my love for those that I love. I realize that when I am away from them for periods of time how deep my love for them truly is. I try to be good about making sure I tell them in some way fairly often. I think today, it is more about treating them with that deep love each and every moment. It's a good time of year to reach out to those you love and let them know how important they are to you. That's my goal for this season. Share the love.

Invite Him

Today is my day to think on Jesus. I'm preparing myself for the coming weekend of concerts. I'm hoping to be used by God to touch the lives of people, but I need to invite Him to come with me.

Extra Gifts

Singing is one of my greatest joys in life. I have been blessed with a great gift and I don't take it for granted. During the holiday season, I enjoy all of the concerts I get to be a part of. Each style of music does something for my soul that is very particular. The choral music at church touches my heart in word and sound. The Cathedral orchestra and choir give me a sense of hope and joy for the season.  The family stuff we get to do on Christmas Eve is where my heart is the fullest. God moves mightily in music for me. I know He uses it to touch the lives of those around me as well.  Be on the lookout for what God has given you.  At this time of year, I think it's good to ponder those extra gifts we've been given.

It's Quick

I'm thinking about how I have already noticed a change in my reaction to frustrating situations, since turning it over to God last week.  I find that I am quicker to look at those situations with Kingdom eyes and recognize that something larger than me is at work. I am noticing that God may be using those things in a mighty way, or He's using them to help me practice "off the spot" for those moments that will come down the road that will have a larger impact on others. Either way, God is working and it makes me feel incredibly loved and cared for. When I turn something over to Him, in relation to my heart, He is on it immediately.  Now if I can only get my mind to recognize that this is happening in my daily movements as well and not just in my heart, all will be well.

Hope Renewed

It has been a long run to get to this day.  I have been busy pretty much every minute of every day for the last two weeks, which includes being sick and having to rest for what equalled one day. The beauty is that, God knows what I need, when I need it. I have been given a couple of evenings to rest and relax before heading into the next marathon of concerts. Outside of all the hustle and bustle of the Christmas season, I have a deep sense that God is moving somewhere else too.  I don't know where it is yet, but I think I'm going to find out very soon.  In this season of anticipation, I am now waiting with expectancy for what God is about to reveal. The coming Messiah brings my focus back to the hope of what is promised, eternity in Heaven. But oh, the bliss, when we get to experience Heaven on Earth! That's what Christmas is all about.

Now and Forever

Lord, a simple prayer to say thank you. Thank you for making the time to transform my heart and revealing to me your intention in your creation in me. I'm humbled by your love and care. There are no words to express, so I give my heart to you, now and forever. Amen.

God Is Moving

I've been noticing all of the little things lately, things like, eyes, smiles, interactions among friends, and so on. These are all places I see God moving.  I seek to find God in the mundane parts of life because I don't know that any part of life is so mundane, especially when you start to realize that God is all over every bit of it. Through the laughter and tears, God is moving continually. Even when we don't see it, there is workings going on to get us through. When you can't see it is when you have to just know it.  I don't just know it with my head though, I know it with my heart.  God is faithful. He is always working on my behalf. It's fun when you can see God at work, and simply, you just have to look for Him and you will find Him.

Taking Care of Me

I'm taking care of me today and not posting anything major.  It's been a long several days with no relaxation and late nights.  I don't want to get sick, again, so I'm taking the day off.  I'll be back tomorrow. You rest too. ;-)

Another Heart Transformation

I've not been impressed with myself lately. I get busy and then I turn into a not so nice person with myself.  I'm still kind to others, but I get frustrated quickly with myself and I don't think kind thoughts or words.  It definitely keeps me humble.  I realize I have a long way to go on this journey with Jesus.  I don't want my mind and mouth to get all worked up when I'm tired and overwhelmed.  I want to be calm and collected.  So, here is the next step for me in my journey of transformational grace.  God, it is now your turn to work on my heart in these moments of frustration. Make me calm, give me your eyes and words to respond. Give me your wisdom as I struggle through the "not enough time" syndrome. Lord, I don't want to respond with grumpy words or phrases or frustrated thoughts. I want peace and joy to reign in my heart at all times.  Lord, please do this within me. Transform my heart in this area. Amen.

Think On Jesus

Today is a prompting day to just sit for a few minutes and think on Jesus. Join me.

Only the Prompting

I'm finding it hard these days to make time for myself to rejuvenate.  I love the Christmas season so very much and, unfortunately, that means I am busy with all sorts of fun things.  This is leading to not much free time for my mind or my body. I take a few minutes here and there to let my mind rest and to give my body time to relax. The sad thing is I feel as though I am not accomplishing all of the tasks I want to accomplish.  Time is running short for all of the things I want to do. Here's what I'm doing to remedy the situation.  I'm making time only for the things God is prompting me to do.  This way I can also spend time with Jesus as I am prompted as well. It's nice that I have experience just sitting with Jesus, even if I only get five minutes of peace. I am attuned to those short moments where I can give Jesus all of me, so He can restrengthen me for the ride.  It's a good one, but it is definitely tiresome.  I want Jesus to shine this Christmas and in order to do that I can't leave Him out of it.  I'm doing what He tells me to and giving Him myself when He calls.

Reason To Pause

Dad has been preaching on God moving in unexpected ways using the Christmas story during Advent. It's been giving me reason to pause. I'm thinking about my own expectations of God and looking closely at the ways I put God into a box as to how He does things in my world. I would love to say I don't, that I'm just always seeking God and willing to admit that He could show up in any way.  I don't think that's the case though.  I think I have conveniently figured out my own little system to decide when God will move and what it will look like.  That's not working so well for me right now.  God is not doing what I'm expecting and especially not when I'm expecting. Now what? It's time to consider that God moves how and when He deems best. I need to live in expectancy, not expectation. Those are two very different things. Expectancy is knowing that God will move, and giving Him the control.  Expectation is having an end in mind, whether that's the action or the timing. It's tricky for me, a strategic person, to live with expectancy. I'm praying for God to transform my heart and mind to live in expectancy rather than expectation.

Listening Prayer

Lord, sometimes there are not words to express what the heart knows. Let me listen to you today in this prayer time.  Let me hear your voice speaking, "I came for you because I love you." Amen.

Hope Is a Person

Some days are just difficult.  There are not words to express what the heart feels. The pain is deep the sadness is real. Life comes after you sometimes, even in the midst of a joyful season around.  My thoughts are always with those for whom the holidays are not enjoyable.  They may be filled with memories of a relative who has passed away, memories of an unenjoyable family life, no memories of family at all, or just a barrage of feelings of inadequacy, chaos, or panic.  This is a season of hope. Jesus came to us in the broken world to show us what hope looks like. He became one of us in order that He could understand our pain and our sorrow.  He gets it. He is there. He is ready to listen. He is ready to pick you up and carry you. Let Jesus in a little closer this Christmas season.  Give Him the opportunity to speak to your soul as He so longs to do. He is a gentlemen, so ask Him in. In my personal times of sadness, loss, struggle, and panic, He has been my hope. He is my joy through tears. He is my strength. I want you to have Him too. Ask Him in.

For Those In Need

Colossians 4:5-6 Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.

This is a good reminder for me as we continue on the journey of advent. This is the perfect time of year for the Gospel to be shared. We must keep in mind the ears of our listeners and the hearts of our seekers. Jesus came in an unexpected way, born in a stable, shown to shepherds first. He is for those in need. He came for the lost and the sinners. While I am grateful that I have been given the opportunity to know Christ at such an early age and have spent 30+ years with him, I try to be mindful of my state before knowing Him fully. In this way, I have a better chance of sharing with others in grace and can see others with the eyes of Jesus.  It is all important to let Christ lead in the conversations about Him. Let Him guide your tongue and open your heart to those around you, so that He can be born anew for someone this Christmas.

A Drifting Mind

My mind is drifting today. I have started this blog post six times and none of them are sticking.  I get about four sentences in and delete. I can't decide what I want to say. I can't decide what I'm hearing God say today. For me it seems to be more about caring for oneself and not feeling guilty when one does. It is about making time during the busy Christmas season to spend time alone with Jesus for any amount of time possible each day. Even when my mind is drifting, these are still the best moments of my day because Jesus joins me and we can have time together.  Christmas is about Jesus, why not make this season about spending time with Him and see what happens? It might just change your life. ;-)

Light of the Broken World

My mind is on those who live with a chronic illness or have a continuing battle of some sort. Many times we can see the pain in people's lives, but often there is pain that is too deep to see. During the holidays, I am always aware of those who have hardship and are struggling to celebrate anything.  This doesn't mean that I feel guilty about my own joy. I am able to empathize to some degree and recognize the need we all have for Christ's joy to be in our hearts. I never want to discount someone's situation, but always want to draw the eyes of others to Jesus. This is the perfect season to do that. If someone is downtrodden, let the heart of Jesus shine through you and bring light to the broken world. May the Spirit of God dwell richly in, around, and through you this Christmas season, and may Jesus be as tangible now as he was lying in the manger.

That's Power!

My thankful heart is focused on the love of God and the intercession of Christ on our behalf with the loving Father. At times I do not know what to pray or how to pray for other's or even my own situation.  At this moment I ask Jesus to step in with His words to ask the Father. There is no other way to go, but to God, especially when the way is dark. I've learned to walk with Jesus, taking each step with Him and focusing all of my attention on Him. There are times when only step by step is how we can move because the end is unknown. The beauty is that in those times, Jesus knows exactly where to step and what is coming and with Him we are more than conquerors of the darkness. That's power!

Too Great To Grasp

In this first week of advent, I am thinking about the gift of Jesus. The love of God to send Jesus to the world to take the punishment of my sin is unfathomable. And yet, He gave that gift to me, to each of us. It's humbling to think about the cost in Jesus' coming for everyone involved.  It wasn't simple for Mary and Joseph either.  Their course was changed completely. I've been lamenting the fact that I have not accomplished all that I thought I would have by this point in my life.  I'm following God too, however, people don't look at me in judgement because of my change in course.  As a matter of fact, no one would even know my life is different than I expected. So my lamentations are selfish. I cannot even begin to know what Mary felt or the hardship Joseph endured.  But beyond that, to understand what Jesus did and the weight that he carried not only for me, but for the entire world, is too great for me to grasp.  What I can grasp is the love of God that has called me to Him and the transformational grace that has changed my heart so my circumstance, my course, is nothing compared to my life in Christ. I am grateful for the gift of Jesus this season and the hope that He brings.

The Blessings of Tragedy

In preparation for the upcoming Thanksgiving holiday, I've been noticing things I'm thankful for. I think we all do that. :-)  Seriously though, it's the blessings that I don't think of as blessings that I'm starting to see more and more. The frustrating financial situation that has drawn me nearer to God. The waiting and wondering that leads me to tears, but gives me a tangible grasp on Jesus. We often only look at blessings as being those things that are all good all the time, which some blessings are. The reality is that we do receive blessing out of the worst experiences. Blessing is anytime God is near, and frankly, the nearness of God is at its fullness when we are in tragedy. What blessings have you received this year out of the "tragedy" you've had?

Prompting a Hiatus

I've been doing a lot of thinking about social media lately, and trying to decide how that's fitting into my walk with Jesus. Jesus desires a personal relationship and social media is about as far from that as one can get. I spend time "connecting" with friends and looking at what others are up to, but I'm not really building any lasting relationships. Beyond that, social media is a time sucker for me. I spend more time scrolling through a feed or watching ridiculous videos. There is definitely a time and place for it all, but I feel as though it is easy to get caught up in it. I'm planning to take some time off. We'll see when and how that happens.  God and I are in talks about it. He's prompting a hiatus is coming very soon for me. I'll keep you posted. ;-)

My All

Father, I pray for your clarity and peace to come over me. May I see your working and lean on your understanding. Give me hope in the midst of the waiting. Give me peace amidst the chaos. Give me strength in the throes of weakness. You are my all. Amen.

Assurance in the Uncertainty

My mind seems a little mushy these days and I don't know why. My time with God is spent sitting in silence with my mind drifting to Jesus. I go in and out of thoughts of when I have seen God moving, things I'm waiting for, things I'm hoping for, and how I have been changed.  God has transformed my heart this year pretty substantially.  I find myself questioning things, and not in a whiny or uncertain way, but in an anticipatory way. I'm taking account of all that has happened and trying to piece it together. I can feel I'm being molded for something very particular, but I don't quite yet have the vision of what that is. I think this is how God works in us. We find ourselves changed, and we didn't even realize we were being changed. We find our passions and interests have led us to a certain place and we weren't intending to go there. We find Jesus in places we would have never guessed Him to be. Then we try to figure out the calling. The good thing is God is very good at being clear. I'm seeking and have been faithful. I know God will be clear when He is ready to reveal His will to me. It's good to reflect, but I'm looking toward the future too.

I'm Normal

No particular thoughts are coming to mind today. That's what I get for writing each day, I guess. At least now you know one, I do write these daily, and two, sometimes God is quiet with me as well.  I'm just on my path doing my thing and God is right here with me.  I'll just revel in that for today.

Rest My Mind

Today is a quiet day with Jesus. It's been a busy week in my mind, not so much physically, and I'm needing to rest my mind. In order to do that I sometimes focus on a word or a phrase, other times it's a picture or a memory. Just like our bodies need rest, so do our minds. We need to make time to let our minds drain of the worldly clutter and fill with heavenly thoughts. It's not that I'm avoiding what's  going on in my life, or that I'm choosing to not deal with it. It is simply that I need my mind to refocus on what I know is truth. I need to let God's thoughts become my thoughts, especially when my thoughts are cluttered with the world's viewpoint. I'm looking for a heavenly viewpoint on my earthly situation. I'm seeking rest in the thoughts of the Father. This is how I rest my mind and gain perspective for journey.

Relinquish Control

I've recently been trying to take back something I had turned over to God. I get going along, doing just great with letting God do His thing, then a bump in the road pops up and I'm back to my scheming again.  I try to figure out how I can fix the problem, even though for the last 4 months I've let God work on it.  That frustrates me about myself, that I keep picking up my problems again. I'm getting better at handing them back over to God quicker, but I just want to be able to leave them to Him for good.  I'm strategic. I'm a thinker. I'm a "pick yourself up by your bootstraps and get it done" kind of a person. It's hard for me to relinquish control, especially over things I think I'm supposed to be responsible for. God has done a lot of work in my heart to help me with the control. I've learned that I just changed the word to responsible instead of control and that was how I'd made it "okay" for me to be in charge. God has shown me that when He calls me to a thing, He is in complete control of it and He takes full responsibility for the outcome. He is growing me deeper with these situations in which I want to take responsibility, by making it impossible for me to be strategic.  It's tough learning, but He has made my heart much softer and I can feel Him molding me.

The Hustle and Bustle

As we head into the holiday season, I am reminded of the anticipation and hope of Christmas.  There are so many traditions and memories, all of which make this time of year special. The trick for me is keeping myself grounded and not running myself into the ground.  There are so many opportunities to get together with friends and family, presents that can be bought, treats that can be baked, and decorations to be put up. It's easy to get caught in the busyness trap. I tend to say yes to many things at this time of year. The way I keep myself from feeling burned out is that one, I keep the main thing the main thing. This is really all about Jesus. When I'm feeling overwhelmed, I focus on Jesus.  The second thing I do is those things that I say yes to are the ones that are life-giving.  They are my spirit fillers.  Instead of saying yes to the things that drain me, I keep returning to those things that God has given me that make my spirit overflow during the season. I pray that as you enter this season, you find those things that help you keep the main thing the main thing, and that you do the things that make your cup runneth over.  Christmas time's a-comin'!

The Value of the Soul

Lord, may your peace come to us. May you give value to each and every person who is searching. May they find you and find themselves in you. Help us to see that the value of a person is his/her soul.  May they know us by our love for one another. Amen.

A Quick Tongue

Something I've learned, and maybe already have written on, in the last five years is the importance of taking time to respond. I used to be very quick to react, whether that was to an email, a phone call, or an action. And generally, I can say my reactions were typically accurate for how I felt and thought days later.  However, as I've learned in the past 5 years, taking time to react is invaluable.  It's not that my response changes, necessarily, but the way I respond has changed.  My tongue was quick to speak my mind. I've become cognizant of the words I use and how I use them.  I recognize the power my words have and how utilizing a larger vocabulary invokes a more focused and emphasized response, while at the same time conveying my feelings. Taking time to react gives your words and actions more weight, because you can speak the truth with love. It's not easy, I'll give you that, but it is so important.

It Won't Matter

It's kind of a great thing that this life is temporary. This truth keeps me grounded when the things of Earth are a little more than I'm willing to deal with. Sometimes I need to take a step back to focus on what is lasting, my relationship with Jesus is all I will leave this world with. I won't have my house, or my family. It won't matter what clothes I wore or what food I ate. It won't matter how often I read a book or rode a bike. It won't matter who I voted for or what church I went to. All that matters in the end is, do I know Jesus Christ as my personal Lord and Savior? Do I have a relationship with Him? When my body is laid to rest, my soul will be with Jesus, of this I am certain.  Praise God for the eternal and give God control over the temporal.

Freedom In Christ

I was reminded today about my post two years ago about being right versus being righteous.  My goal is to be righteous, meaning put Jesus at the forefront of all of my actions, words, thoughts, etc.  I believe God speaks to each person as each person needs. It is key to spend time listening for God's voice and learning how to discern His words. The world is broken. It is tricky to navigate at times. People don't handle pain and hurt terribly well and we lash out at one another to prove we are right or justified.  The truth is we are only justified in Jesus. Our actions, our words, our thoughts cannot be justified by us, so whether we are right or not isn'trelevant. We are called to be righteous through justification granted to us by the blood of Jesus. Focus your effort on being righteous through Christ rather than on being right. There is freedom in Christ.

Cick here to read my "Right vs. Righteous" post from 2014 

What a Blessing!

I'm finding joy this day in thinking on my blessings. God has bestowed many, many wonderful things along the journey that have made life joyful...family, music, church, job, friends...just to name a few. Those are the obvious ones that bring happiness most of the time, blessings that are easy to identify as blessings.  But the blessings that overwhelm me, are the ones that are not so positive from the start, those things that hit you in the gut.  Mom's cancer, losing a loved one, emotional stress, debt...these are all things that I can now look at and say, "What a blessing!" Why, you ask? Because, to me, blessings are things that draw me close to God. Blessing comes when the Spirit shows up and life with Jesus gets real...tangible. The blessings from suffering are worth so much more to me than the blessings from rejoicing. My soul has been deeply impacted more so by those things that cause me pain, than those that cause me instant happiness. So do I hope for suffering? Heavens, no! But I can say that I do not fear suffering, for I know the blessing that I will receive will be far greater. Glory be to God for He is the Giver of all good things!

Time Got Away

Some days, time gets away from you. These are the days that I take a moment to just be with Jesus and recoup to move forward.  God knows that we have busy times. The key is to make sure that the busy times don't become the norm or start to continually take you away from God. Live life to its fullest, but always make time for Jesus in each day, even if it is just a few minutes. Time with Him matters.

Was, Is, and Will Be

I'm somebody who likes to look ahead to the next thing. Sometimes there isn't a next thing to see, which is kind of where I am right now, or the next thing is a long way off maybe without a time line attached. These are times when I have to take a step back and think about how I have gotten to this point. There are so many ways God moves and many different actions He asks us to take.  Some of those actions land us in a great spot. Others put us in quite an earthly predicament. That's how I feel right now. The actions God has asked us to take, and the obedience of taking those actions has put us in an earthly predicament. It is not life or death, but we feel hard pressed on every side. As I've written before, it becomes imperative for me to look back and see where God was faithful in the midst of the action. And, in order to move forward, I stand on the solid rock of Jesus with my feet poised for the next step of faith.  I do not know what will happen next.  I do not know what action we will be called to take. I do know that God was, is, and will be faithful to the calling to which He has given us. I don't need my "what's next" question answered; I need to stay connected to Jesus.

In the Name of Jesus

Father, as we head into another week, I pray for your Spirit to guide us. Lead us to the life everlasting and lift us from despair. Bring hope into the broken world, and give our souls rest from the strain of life. May we find our peace and joy in You, Lord, as we seek Your face. You are holy and worthy of praise, Father. May our hearts be ever seeking You. In the powerful name of Jesus, Amen.

Day of Rest

Taking a break today, or rather, a day of rest. ;-)

Whammo!

I'm amazed at how in the smallest moments of the day, I get a glimpse of the work of the Spirit. I'm going along, doing what I do, talking with people, and whammo! the Spirit moves. Yep, I said whammo. It is a sudden moment sometimes. Nothing seems special and then suddenly, I feel the Spirit move. It's quick, but it's unmistakeable. I get the goose bumps or my heart beat quickens and I'm instantly energized spiritually. It's fun! That's what living in Christ is. It's recognizing that God is at work in, around, and through me all the time. It's expecting Him to move in the unexpected way. I know that sounds a little odd, but think about it. Walk through your day expecting to see God or feel the Spirit move, and it will happen.  It won't be at the time you think or in the way you expect, but it will happen. God will move. Just make sure you give Him the credit. ;-)

Set Free

John 14:1 "Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me."

I needed to read Jesus' words today. It seems so simple, to trust, but it is one of the hardest aspects of my walk with Jesus, especially when life starts to come at me a bit. I am so easily shaken by particular things, and each time they rear their ugly heads, I am shaken. I know I have more growing to do and I know that God is working richly in me. It's just that sometimes the refiners fire is a bit painful and even scary. This verse is perfect because it reminds me of where to look. Look to God because He looks at the heart.  All of these things that shake me have no impact on my heart. My salvation is secure. I am loved by the Creator of the universe. I am resting in His power and I live in His resurrection. I can trust in the finished work of Christ on the cross and my heart is not troubled, it is set free. Amen!

Fear Is Set Aside

My biggest fear is being misunderstood.  I know that sounds silly, but it's the truth.  God has been really challenging me with that lately. He and I have had many conversations about this topic since I've been facing this fear pretty hard core. On Sunday, God pointed out something very obvious that I'd never thought of before. Jesus spent much of his ministry being misunderstood.  He eventually died because of it. I don't think I'm going to die because of this, but I do have a new understanding of how I am understood by the Savior in my fear. Jesus has so much more to offer than I realize. I have been walking with Him for a long time and yet, the most obvious things about Him go right over my head sometimes. My prayer has been that I would come into closer, deeper relationship with Him and I'm finding that means I end up facing many fears I would rather leave alone. However, there is something that happens in those face to face moments that can only be described as Jesus moments. The fear is set aside and I am able to focus on the face of the One who is my salvation. Circumstances are becoming less and less and my relationship with Christ is becoming more and more.

Snuggle In

I've been having lots of candid conversations with God about waiting. It has been a year of delays. I don't have a clear picture of the timeline for many things right now. I know God is working and He is providing as needed, but the waiting is getting a bit nerve-racking. God has been working in me, making so many big changes. It's actually been kind of an uncomfortable 2016. It's seeming that the things I was expecting would happen in 2016 will not be coming until at least 2017. This is okay for a few of those items, but for others, it makes me sidle up next to God as the waiting is uncomfortable. I guess that's what life's all about anyway, sidling up next to God when things get uncomfortable. We never seem to get close to him when things are going the way we expect, so I'm going to smile at the fact that He is drawing me near with the waiting. I guess I'll just embrace it and snuggle right in. I think it's going to be a while.

It's Personal

Today is a reminder to realize that every person you come across has something going on in his/her life that probably isn't public knowledge, on purpose. There are many people, myself included, who have difficulties that they do not share with the world.  It's not a matter of pride or anything. It is a matter of it being personal.  One, we need to respect that, but two, we need to enter in with grace. I know I tend to be quick to have an opinion, and that's not really the best. It would be better to take a step back, ask a few questions in my own mind, and then show love and grace. I am not the judge of anyone.  It is not my job. And, frankly, I don't want to be. God is in charge of all of that, and I am great with that. So as polarizing times draw nearer, just be aware that each person we meet has a story and that story comes with its own ups and downs. We probably won't know about most of them, or at least we won't know about the depth of them, and our own experiences definitely don't make us experts.  Love on each other and show grace.  I think maybe Jesus said that. ;-)

Closer and Deeper

Father, in all that I do I pray that your light would shine through.  Get me out of the way and work your will into my daily walk. Give me eyes to see you work and ears to hear your word. My desire is to be closer to you with every step and to grow deeper in you every minute. May your thoughts be my thoughts and your ways my ways. Amen.

Living Word

Daniel 6:16 So the king gave the order, and they brought Daniel and threw him into the lions' den. The king said to Daniel, "May your God, whom you serve continually, rescue you!"

This is a fascinating story to me, in that, the king, who issues the decree, cannot revoke it. It must be carried out and the king is just sick that it has to be carried out on Daniel. His words here to Daniel are sincere. He is relieved in the morning when Daniel has been saved. This verse has my word for the year in it, rescue. I have been pondering this word quite a bit as of late. God has recently revealed that it is me to whom the word refers, for right now anyway. I am learning to trust in God to rescue me. The words of King Darius rang out to me today as I read them, as if he was saying them to me. The Word of God is living, for sure, and He knows exactly what we need to read and when. God knows how His words will penetrate our souls and give us peace deep within. Thanks be to God, for His Word is life!

The Saints

Sometimes my mind is drawn to those who have gone to be with Jesus. I think about the impact they have had on my life and the fortunate one I have been to have known them. The way that those people lived out their walk with Jesus is something that I am drawn to over and over. I think back on how I felt being with each of them and knowing in my soul that something was different about them. I'm grateful for the way they shared their journeys with Jesus and that He was evident in their lives. It's a day to remember, but also a day to rejoice. Even though they have gone before and are not here with me now, they are very alive in Christ in Heaven. It's beautiful. And I know they are all praying for me and my family. This is what life in Christ is all about! The saints who have gone before and the sisters and brothers who are with us still. We are meant for relationship with one another.

Five Minutes

This is my day this week to just be with Jesus.  Have you had your day this week?

No Outward Sign

I have spent 30 minutes just sitting and thinking about all of the things God has been doing in my life.  Lately, it seems that things are not progressing in any of the areas of my life.  I feel like it's been a bit 'status quo' in our house as we've been waiting. But as I think about how God is working, it seems to me He is working more internally than externally.  It's an interesting thought to have. I can identify all of the ways God has been transforming my heart and it makes me curious to know what is coming in the future due to the changes I've experienced inwardly.  The anticipation and hope that I have for what's coming is renewed again, through the work I can see God doing in me. That's kind of fun. It's definitely giving me a new perspective on where to look for God's work.  When there isn't an outward sign, take a look inside.

Not Number One

Life can be so complex. I have many different facets of my daily life that all require my full attention and energy. It's not just as simple as working a job and coming home. It's not just that taking care of home is all that is important. My self-care is on the top of my list too.  So many facets of life and yet it seems that every one of them is at the top of my list. I once had a pastor friend make the statement that Jesus isn't number one on your list, Jesus is your list.  I really took that to heart.  His point was that if we put Jesus as number one, then we are less likely to include him in numbers two through whatever.  Making Jesus your list means giving Him every number on your list.  When you do that, lots of different things can take over number one at any given time, but in the end, Jesus will be the One.  That's my goal in my crazy complex life, not to put Jesus number one, but instead to make Him the One who is my life.

Outside My Comfort Zone

What's your impact? That's my newest thought. Am I allowing Jesus to shine through in every possible moment? My goal is to seek Him in all things and in all circumstances. I don't know that I'm able to do that. I want my impact to be for the Kingdom and to do that, relationship is a must.  Relationship with Jesus and relationships with others. I like to keep to myself whenever I get the chance, so sometimes it is very hard for me to enter into social situations. I have to remind myself in those moments that my goal is for Jesus to be seen in me, around me, and through me. In order for others to see this, I have to be around people. I often pray for God's strength to get me through and for His courage to be mine. I make time for myself as I know it's necessary, but there are definitely times where I feel God calling me to be there for someone. Thankfully, I've learned to draw from His well in order to accomplish the tasks that are outside my comfort zone and when I do, I find the most fulfilling experiences ensue. I pray you draw on God's strength and courage when you are outside of your comfort zone.  There is nothing more satisfying.

God's Will

Father, as I fuss with this new learning and growing, give me the peace to hand control over to you. May you be in each and every part of the situation. May your Spirit wash over and guide my actions and words. Your will be done. Amen.

Fear, Control, Trust

God and I had a really good conversation today. It was a hard conversation, but it was good. I am being faced with one of my biggest fears as of late and I can now see God working through it.  I don't know what the purpose is completely, I just know that it is another area where I didn't recognize my desire for control. It's difficult because God is telling me to trust Him completely and that none of this is in my control. These are harsh words for me right now...fear, control, trust. I'm growing deeper and it is not a feel good time, that's for sure. However, it is beyond amazing to know that God is this interested in me as a human being that He cares enough to walk the road with me. Transformation is not all smiley and happy, but it is hopeful as I look toward what God is preparing me to do next.

The Lie

When I find myself in the midst of a storm, all I want to do is sit with Jesus. That's a good thing. I'm being fed the lie that it isn't enough. Satan is working hard to convince me that I need to jump in and do something to calm the storm.  Jesus is quietly telling me to remain in Him. His calm voice is telling me He's got it. I get so frustrated with Satan because he tries to drown out the voice of the Savior, the One who's in control of it all.  I have to constantly remind myself of what I know and who I know.  I speak out the lie to others, my mentors, who can help me to remove the lie. Jesus does want me to sit with Him in the midst of the storm.  He desires my trust and my faithfulness as He calms the wind and waves. I must trust in Him and seek His voice amidst the din of the storm. May Jesus bind the evil one from me.

Focus on Him!

Here is my one day a week when I just sit with Jesus in the quiet.  I love this day. Focus on Him!

Extreme Moments

Today I'm considering my go to attitude when I'm exhausted. How do I treat others? How do I treat myself? What is my outlook when I'm worn out? This is something that for me follows in line with every other extreme situation. So, whether I'm tired or frustrated, happy or sad, excited or bummed, I go at the extreme situation with a God who is the same. My strength in any and all situations is drawn from Jesus.  He is the same in every situation and that is what pulls me through. When I find myself in these extreme moments, I pray for God's strength to infiltrate my soul and carry me through to the other side. My experience has been, He is faithful.  When I've prayed this prayer in the past, I have physically and emotionally felt myself actually lifted and I have been able to be life-giving to others through Jesus.  It's pretty amazing.  That's my prayer for this week. :-)

The Skewed Self-Perception

God has been challenging me to look at myself as He sees me.  For some reason I find this very hard to do.  I tend to be critical of myself.  I tend to notice all of my flaws. When I look at myself as God views me, I am reminded that my perspective of myself is skewed by culture and the broken world. It has been good for me to sit quietly and reflect on who God has made me to be. I have been reflecting on my own growth over the last several years. I am in awe of the ways God has shaped me and transformed my actions and my thinking. Some of the things that are different are areas I didn't even realize were a problem until they were healed. That's the power of the Holy Spirit! My self-perception is being molded by God. He is continuing to show me who He created me to be and He desires for me to see myself just as He sees me.  Oh, what a challenge!

You Will Not Worry

I've attempted to write on several topics today and none of them is sticking. So, what do I want to say today? It's easy. Seek Jesus.  Find who you are in Him and everything else will fall into place.  Life won't be perfect, but you won't mind. Life will have bumps, but you won't be swayed. Life will be hard, but you will not worry. What do I want to say today? Make your life all about Jesus and everything else will take care of itself.

God's Goodness

Father, thank you for your goodness to me. You have filled my life to overflowing with wonderful people. You provide me all I need to experience deep joy in the midst of all of life. Your Word is my Truth and your Truth is my life. Thank you for the blessings you bestow. Amen.

Always Only Good

God has been so prevalent this week.  He has shown Himself in the silence, in relationships, and in the everyday. I have learned to look for God in the midst of all things, because He seems to reveal Himself in all sorts of ways. I'm careful to put God into a box or a pattern of thought because just when I do that, He does something new. The great about God's movement is that it is always peaceful, it is always good, it is always righteous.  It's easy to pick out "God stuff" when He is always only good. I love that about Him! All good things come from the Lord. :-) So if you're ever wondering if something was of God, ask yourself if there was good in it. If your answer is yes, then you saw God. Enjoy looking for His goodness!

A Fresh Look At Old Circumstances

I have had so many moments this week where God has shown Himself.  I feel like He has shown off a bit actually. ;-)  It's fun when you are able to take a step back and really watch and listen. You see things with a whole new perspective. You recognize how much God has a part in your life. You get to watch God at work, when you keep your mouth quiet enough to pay attention.  Okay, go back and change all of those you to I. That's all about me this week. I struggle with being quiet in the presence of God. I struggle with stepping back and watching Him at work. I'm appreciative of the new perspective and the fresh look at old circumstances. It's great because I get to see that God was/is at work the whole time, even when I feel like He's taking a break. When God is quiet, that's a really good time to start paying really close attention.

Five Minutes

It's another day of just sitting quietly. I'm trying to pinpoint what it is that I'm gaining from these quiet times with God. It seems like it is a necessary respite that I didn't even realize I needed.  He is providing me time to allow my mind to be free of all of the hindrances of the day because I'm focused on the quiet. Listening is such an important part of life with Jesus and I am guilty of overlooking it. I want answers or I want to just talk to Him about whatever is going on, but sometimes it is more important to hush up. I'm taking five minutes to just listen, focus on Jesus and listen. It's been my theme this week.

A Quiet Calm

I am feeling a little dry this week. I don't have many thoughts coming to mind when I sit to spend time with Jesus. I'm okay with that. I know He is present. I know He is working. I have peace. I just don't have a lot of words. I believe this is how growing a relationship is. There are times where many thoughts flood into your mind and you are confronted with new ideas or new ways of thinking. Sometimes there are insights into current practices or learning that refines with time and experience. And yet other times there is a quiet calm that settles. We need all of these times. I'm in a quiet calm time, and I'm good with that. The peaceful sound of silence.

Deepest Joy

I don't have any fancy thoughts today. I'm actually kind of out of thoughts today. I'm just grateful for the blessings of life, that in the midst of seemingly nothing but blandness of life, God bestows His deepest joy on me through my family. God is good, no matter the circumstances. We've learned that deeply over the last few years. Sorrow ebbs and flows, but the joy of the Lord endures!

The Best Life

Lately I've been thinking about things I thought would come to pass, but have not. I've been looking back at life, thinking about where I thought I would be and what I thought I would have accomplished up to this point. It's funny to me how I had so many plans, dreams you could even call them, that have not happened.  It's not because I didn't do them or because I didn't try to accomplish them. It's more about the fact that those things were not a part of God's plan. As I've grown, my plans have become more in line with God's. There are still plans that I am unsure as to whether they are God's, but I move forward with my focus on Him.  Am I bummed that some of my plans haven't happened? Sometimes. However, I am able to recognize that God's plans are always the best. A statement that recently has been shared with me is, "Good is the enemy of best." This has helped me in the face of these thoughts.  What I thought would be a good life, God is showing me is not the best life. I'm trying to grasp what God sees as the best life for me and move away from the good life conformities. I hope that makes sense. I'm just starting to grapple with it all.

Prayer for Healing

Lord, a prayer of healing for those who are hurting. There is so much pain in the world and I know you understand that a deeper level than most of us ever will.  Father, heal our souls, minds, and bodies.  Infiltrate our lives with your Spirit. You are the Great Healer. Rest your mighty hand on those who have need and give them the joy and peace that only comes from you. Amen.

Spend Time At the Well

Life is messy. It isn't simple. It isn't fair. If you want to be sad or mad all the time, it's pretty easy to find things to feel that way. It's easy to get caught up in the negative. This is why it is so important for us to spend time with God.  God is good. He is the only part of our world that is good all the time. Every time I go to God, even when I don't get the response I want, I know He is rooting for me and working for my good. Life can be messy. Circumstances can be overwhelming. Thankfully we have a God who loves us so much that He extends every good thing He has to us. As Christians, we have the power that resurrected Jesus living inside us. We have so much good to tap into, we just need to spend time at the well. That's what it's all about, spending time with Jesus, so our eyes are fixed on Him instead of the world we live in. Then our joy can be made complete.

My Moment

This is that day for me. I just need my moment to be still.

Psalm 65:5-8 You answer us with awesome deeds of righteousness, O God our Savior, the hope of all the ends of the earth and of the farthest seas, who formed the mountains by your power. having armed yourself with strength, who killed the roaring of the seas, the roaring of her waves and the turmoil of the nations. Those living far away fear your wonders; where morning dawns and evening fades you call forth songs of joy.

His Endurance

I've been trying to decide the best way to move forward when doors seem to be closing left and right. I'm always very careful to watch for patterns and seek God's will as the situation unfolds. When I'm having a hard time finding His movements, I go back to earlier parts of the journey where I know God was moving us in a particular direction. I actually have those things written down for times like this. There are moments when you are on the journey with God and you are doing everything He's asked and, then, suddenly, it seems as though God has taken a break. We don't forget or abandon the journey. We stay on course, even when the course seems foggy. We are praying for our eyes to be opened to where God is working and to see the details of this plan. Unfortunately, we are losing stamina. The ongoing uncertainty is wearing on us and we are needing another reminder of God's will. I'm prayerful that we will have word from Him soon. We are needing His endurance to overtake our tired spirits for a bit.

So Much More

Romans 15:13 May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

I have spent today reading multiple of praise passages and words from Paul. I have pondered all of the things God has done for me over the course of my life. He has been very good to me, even in the midst of deep sorrow and trial.  There is always something to be gained. The beauty of walking with Jesus is the truth that we can experience a little bit of Heaven on earth. We get to walk with the power of the resurrection. As I grow in my relationship with Jesus, I realize how much more there is to Him and how much more we can do together. I am overwhelmed by the love I have already experienced and I am excited by the possibilities that lie ahead of me that I have yet to experience with Him. I want to tap into the Spirit even more and find myself so immersed in God that I can only do the good He does. I am a long way from that, but I am so thankful for the journey I have been given to walk thus far. Oh the depth of the joy that comes from living in Christ!

It's Coming!

I've been thinking a lot about the upcoming holiday season.  We are starting choir at church for Christmas.  I'm getting my Christmas at the Cathedral rehearsals and performances into my planner. It's all starting to come together and it's a little surreal.  It just doesn't seem like it should be that time of year and yet it is approaching quickly.  It makes me smile. I just love Christmas and all of the joy it brings. I enjoy the family and friends, the baking, the fellowship, the decorations, all of it. It is such a hopeful time of year. Memories come flooding back of childhood and family who have gone to be with Jesus, yet my heart is overwhelmed with the joy of the Lord. It's a great time of year and a great time to begin reflecting on the work of God throughout the year. It's on its way, and I'm ready for the anticipation and hope that comes with it.

Feeling Guilty

I was feeling guilty today about sitting on my couch, Dalton on the couch next to me, and doing nothing except keeping up with the laundry. How sad is it that I feel guilty taking time to just be? Something about that guilt seemed very wrong to me. We live in a culture where it's normal to respond to someone who asks how you're doing by saying, busy. I think that's too bad. I enjoyed my time with Dalton today. I enjoyed the fact that we sat together in our quiet home and let our bodies have some down time. For me personally, it is important to have time away from people and rejuvenate for the week, so I don't want to feel guilty about it.  I think we should start a new way of living, spending time with the people we love and not doing anything to keep us "busy". What would it look like to just be with your loved ones? I've been doing that with Jesus and it's been really good for that relationship.  I would say the same would be true for all of our relationships. I'm going to focus on the quality of just being, rather than the guilt of not doing.

You Choose Me

Lord, thank you that you have saved me from the pit. Thank you for your redemptive heart that chooses me every time, even when I don't choose you. Soften my heart to hear you, seek you, and know you deeper.  I love you, Lord, and I want to be nearer to you. Amen.

Words of Life and Truth

The darkest hour is just before dawn. Such a true statement. So why is it we can never seem to remember that in the midst of the darkness? I have found it is very important to have people in your world who can feed you truth in the darkest of times.  We need each other to help us remember what we know, rather than allowing ourselves to get caught up in Satan's schemes.  I am amazed at how lifted my spirit can feel after some of the deepest darkest moments, and how quickly the Spirit is able to bring me up from the pit. It takes words of life and truth given by Jesus through, for me, my family. Speak words of life and truth to someone today.  There is always someone who needs to hear them. Blessings on you, sisters and brothers in Christ!

Real Perspective

I was reminded today of the importance of perspective. Everyone handles situations so differently.  I usually relate this as pain is pain, whether it's pain in your toe or pain from treatment. We have to be careful not to negate other's feelings because we don't think their situation is that significant. Now, it's wise to get a little perspective for your own self on that.  It's good to think about how your situation is in relation to another's just to keep yourself in check. This can go too far though.  One might say, "I had a terrible day and I'm sad about it." A response could be, "Well at least you're not dying of cancer." While this statement is accurate, and one would definitely be a more difficult circumstance than the other, we need to be sure to have compassion for one another. This was something I saw my mother do beautifully as she fought her cancer battle. When life seemed to have it's difficult moments, and I didn't want to "complain" because I wasn't "dying of cancer," Mom would encourage me to talk through those tough times with her. Even when they seemed petty to me, they were important to her. Her compassion was present and her concern for my well-being was completely selfless. This is what real perspective is...being amidst the trials of your own life and having compassion for other's trials, whether great or small.

Deeper Together

Is God the center of my life? Am I rooted in Him? How deep are my roots? Lately it seems as though there are many things Dalton and I are awaiting. Situations we thought would be resolved by now or would at least be heading toward resolution are still hanging out there. We feel as though we don't have any more ideas to try and our last ditch efforts, we are hoping, don't come up short. With that, I've been having to dig deep lately. I've had to recenter myself by spending quality time with Jesus.  I've had to request peace and discernment for next steps. We are seeking God's will and taking steps based on where doors are opening and closing. We've been quite befuddled at times. We've been quite excited at times.  We've been quite annoyed at times. We been quite anxious at times. Thankfully, in all of those emotions, Jesus is constant.  We bend and sway, but we are not shaken at our roots.  Our roots are firmly planted and we are using this time to grow deeper together in Christ. I wish it didn't take hard times to grow.  I wish we would seek God just as much in the good times. Alas, we are human. And, who am I kidding, I enjoy the grace that abounds in those tough moments. I just wish we could have some type of closure somewhere. ;-)

Nothing Left

I have nothing left, physically, spiritually, or emotionally. I'll be back tomorrow.

Forge Ahead

I've been dealing with little bouts of feeling unsettled lately.  They happen in all areas of my life, at home, at work, during workouts, during shopping.  My spirit just feels odd.  Everything from nervousness to lack of interest. I am in a current process of change in multiple areas of life. This causes the unrest. I'm seeking God's movement. The difficulty is that when there are so many areas that seem to be works of progress, I get lost in what's what. These are the times when I sit alone and focus on Jesus.  I close my eyes and say His name over and over.  I try to visualize His feet at the base of the throne as I kneel before Him.  This is the only thing that calms me and gives me rest. I don't get answers in that moment, but I find I don't need them.  This rest gives me the strength to forge ahead and continue to seek Him.

More Than a Conquerer

I'm pondering faith. It's important to put our faith in God, obviously. Unfortunately, I think we fall into the trap of having faith in our faith. We have faith that if we believe in a thing hard enough, long enough, sincere enough, it will come to pass.  This is having faith in faith. Having faith in God looks very differently. Faith in God leaves the will of a thing to His care. It means trusting God enough that in the circumstance and in the outcome you can fully know He is sovereign and His will is perfect. Faith in God means trusting your spirit to His. Only then will you fully know faith. Then you will gain a peace that passes all understanding. Your soul will rest in Jesus and your faith will lead you home to Him, both figuratively and, eventually, literally. Faith the size of a mustard seed, if put in the Father, can move mountains because He is that mighty.  Trust in the strength of the Father, put your faith in His Son, and let His Spirit bring you peace that passes understanding, then you will be more than a conquerer of this world.

Your Love

Father, I thank you for your protection and concern over my life. I thank you that you care for each and every step I take. You watch over my comings and goings and prepare a way for me that is the best possible. Thank you for the way you love on me and the way you instill deep compassion in me. Your love is what makes my life possible.  Thank you. Amen.

So Simple

It seems so simple, positive words and a smile, but sometimes those are hard things to come by. I wonder what Jesus' smile looked like. I wonder what it felt like to have him look you in the eye. I believe his eyes were awe-inspiring to look into. Something about it makes me think you felt like he looked into your soul when he looked at you. Jesus changed so many lives by simply loving people.  He cared for them and they knew how deeply and unconditionally he loved each and every one of them.  People sought him out knowing that he could do something about their condition. I have a feeling some of them were surprised to learn that their healed condition was more spiritual than physical. I seek to do for others what Jesus did, to unconditionally love and care for them. It takes the Spirit within to even begin this process, but I can tell God has been doing some major work in my heart to get me closer to that desire.

Family

Family is kind of a big deal to me. I truly enjoy spending time with Dalton, Dad, and Liz. We know we are very fortunate to have the relationships we have.  It is not something we take for granted.  Today, I think that's all I've got, I'm thankful for my family. Who in your world are you truly thankful for? Who brings you joy? Who makes you feel loved unconditionally? Who would you spend time with if you only had five minutes? Make the time and love on your loved ones a bit. :-)

Rescued From Myself

I am amazed at how run down my mind can get.  I get to a point where my mind is mushy and I can't focus on anything, which I know I've posted about.  My take away is this. I need to do a better job of caring for myself.  I'm often thinking of others and being sure to care for their needs and then forget about my own.  I don't do a good job of time management and find myself at a loss of brain power and energy, without the opportunity to even take time to rejuvenate.  I am now starting to carve out particular parts of my day that are spent just sitting and reflecting on Jesus.  I try to stop my mind, or at least slow it (I mean let's be real, I do have ADHD), as well as slow my body and give myself a little time to regenerate my entire system.  I do so much better on the days I do this.  I need to be much more intentional about it though.  I am not nearly as consistent with it as I could be. It's a goal I have, to give Jesus the time to rescue me from myself.

Not Feeling Awesome

Why do I have to have tough moments?  Why is it that I get moving along just fine, thinking all is going well and then BAM! I'm hit with a solid 15 minutes of ick.  I know everyone has these moments.  And I know Satan knows the best way to get me. Sometimes I feel like I'm already down and then Satan decides to kick me while I lay there. Sadly, I just have to be in the moment.  I have to meet the fear face to face. I have to see it for what it is and get a new perspective on it...a God perspective. I'm tired of not being on the mountain. I'm tired of continually seeking God's perspective just so I can move forward. I'm wondering when things will begin to look up. I'll try to start that upward trend by looking up myself. Even if my circumstance doesn't change, there is still a deep joy within that cannot be lost. That's the really good part and that's also why a 15 minute bout of ick only lasts 15 minutes. Thankful for Jesus being in, around, and through me.

My Own Agenda

I've been spending a lot of time waiting for God to speak.  I ask questions and seek His guidance in multiple situations.  I realize that my prayers have been shallow though.  I have been asking God with my own answers in mind.  I'm not actually seeking His will so much as trying to impose my own. I've found that the best way to remove my own agenda from conversations with God is to ask God what He is excited about and what He is working on.  When I ask those questions, I'm not asking in regards to my life, I'm actually asking Him in the realm of the world. What is God excited about? This gives me a better perspective on what is happening in my life. I'm able to listen to God and hear what He cares about. It doesn't come easily. This can take multiple nights in a row to get myself out of the way enough that I can let God's voice come through. It is a great way  for me to focus my ears on God's voice and tune myself back into His will. His thoughts are not my thoughts, that's for sure!

Identity Theft

Every once in a while, I threaten to get off social media completely. I don't like how I react to some things that are posted. I get frustrated or comparative; sometimes I get annoyed or down on myself. This is one of those times. I need to take a moment and think about why I use social media in the first place. Here is what I know. I know that social media does not define me.  I know that I find my identity in Christ. My selfies, my posts, my likes, my friends, do not make me who I am. Only Jesus makes me who I am. When I get frustrated with people's posts or feel down about my own life, I take stock of where my relationship with Jesus is.  How much time have a I spent with Him? Have I been on social media more than I've spent time with Jesus? Unfortunately, when I find myself having negative feelings about social media, it is usually related to a lack of spending time with Jesus. Please be careful with social media and don't let it steal your identity.  Please find your identity in Jesus Christ. Spend time with Him instead of scrolling through your news feed, at least one time this week. This is my challenge for myself.

Simple

Father I pray your Spirit over him. Bind the evil one that all may go well.  I pray for protection. Give enjoyment and laughter at each turn. Reveal yourself anew and refresh the soul. Amen.

We Didn't Go

Today I recounted part of Mom's story to a friend.  We were discussing the fact that Liz, Dalton and I were not in Rochester when she had her Whipple Procedure. The friend asked if I didn't go because I knew it was going to be okay.  My answer was no. The reasons I didn't go were many. Mom didn't need me there for her. Dad would have just worried about us if we would have been there rather than taking care of himself. I knew where she was going had she not made it through the surgery. I had been able to tell her everything I wanted her to know up to that point.  She knew how much we loved her and cared for her. We believe that life does not end at death. (She came through surgery beautifully, by the way.) From that moment, I realized how important it is to be sure you tell those you love how much you love them and do so often, whether in word or deed. I'm so glad I was able to live my life with my mom to the fullest and share with her all that she was to me and for me. Liz has said many times that Mom feels more alive to her now than she did when she was with us. I agree with that. I'm tired of her not being here with us, but I know where she is and I know the deep joy she feels.

The Calm After the Storm

I listened to the storm. I read some of Ecclesiastes. I sat in the calm of the storm, hearing the tick-tock of the clock. There is something about the calm after a storm that is so peaceful. I suppose it is because our ears and eyes get tired and the quiet after the storm is a relief. I also find the calm to be soothing. It's almost as if the storm has come and cleansed everything and the calm is a time to reflect on what the Lord has just done. I think this would be a great way to look at the "storms" of life.  I know this is exactly what happened following Mom's battle with cancer.  I don't know that I would call that battle a "storm", but you get my thinking.  The year after Mom passed, my family felt like nothing was going on, that we were just kind of doing life. There was no major movement in the God realm. Then it hit me, God was giving us time off, so to speak. He gave us a year to bask in His grace after two years of being grown and stretched. We needed the time to just be. That year was very healing in many ways, but it was a great time of rest too. Since then, God has begun to move mightily in our world and we are starting to feel His leading in new ways, once again. Sometimes you just need a calm after the storm. There's something very right about that.

Invite Him

Here it is, that one day a week where I just feel worn out. My mind goes blank and I realize I haven't spent anytime just sitting with Jesus.  So here it is.  Sit with Jesus for a few minutes today. What do you notice when you sit with Him? I notice a calm and true rest for those moments. There is something so comforting when I invite Him to spend time with me and just be in His presence.  Enjoy!

Life Is Bumpy

Today I am pondering how long bumps in my road have taken to get back to regular smooth life.  For instance, in August of '15 I had a severe high ankle sprain.  I am just now, a year and a month later, finally feeling fairly normal while working out, stretching and so on. Life's physical bumps take time to mend, and they leave us with a new appreciation for our health. The same holds true with emotional bumps. My mom passed away in May of '14 and I'm still processing through all of that.  There are very difficult moments even still.  The beauty about the bumps of life are that they leave us with so much more. God is able to use our bumps to bring us closer to Him and give us grace which changes the very nature of who we are. When we go to Jesus during the healing process, we are truly able to heal. Life may not be like it once was, and that's okay. I've learned to lean on Jesus in the bumps and He gives me peace that passes understanding. He heals my heart and gives me the hope to move forward anew.

Faith Stories

One of the most comforting, most enjoyable, most incredible things about being a Jesus follower is getting to see God at work in the same way in different places.  I've been spending time thinking about my faith stories, those stories that I could share with people that show God's work in my life and have strengthened my faith. I am deeply moved today by a theme that seems to keep popping up as I journey with Jesus. I am still thinking through it and now I'm looking back to see which other faith stories have the same theme. Are there ones I missed? What are the ones to come? When we start to seek God in our world and not just be run over by the world, we get to experience His glory right now. Faith stories that show the glory of God on earth are the best. They don't even have to be our own to have an impact, which is awesome. Jesus' birth is a pretty great story about God's glory, and I think we can all agree, it's had a pretty sizable impact. ;-) Share your faith stories.  Listen to faith stories. Seek God and He will show up. Faith isn't built in a day, it is written over a lifetime.

If you're interested in a more personal look at Faith Stories, come to our Women's Retreat!

Not an Easy Task

Time seems to fly. I do normal daily tasks, and it feels like in an instant it is bedtime. I have spent the last few years really trying to pare down my commitments and focus solely on spending time doing things that bring me closer to Jesus and closer to people. Even in doing that, I find that my time seems to get away from me. I want to be still with Jesus and spend time with Him, yet the pressures of life and job seem to steal away that time. I am not one to enjoy pressure or the feeling of being obligation, yet sometimes those are the only things that keep me doing life on the world's terms. I'm not a fan. Essentially, my goal is to make time for Jesus as often as possible and when the world is too busy, still keep my focus on Him in my busyness. Not an easy task, but a worthy one to be sure.

Always To You

Father, may you be near in any and every situation. May we turn to you in the joy and sorrow. I pray that you would be my only comfort, stronghold, and peace in a world where there are so many ways to try to fulfill your promises without you. I pray I always look to you. Amen.

What I've Learned

Here's a few gems I've learned:

- God is in the business of redemption...and that means ALL things.
- God knows how you feel anyway, so you might as well own it.
- Blessings come out of some of the crummiest situations...even cancer.
- Jesus prays on our behalf. He gets it.
- The Spirit is alive and moving.
- God's thoughts are not my thoughts. ;-)
- God gives us the specific grace we need when we need it, not before and not after.
- When all seems lost, the only light you need is Jesus.
- God has a plan for you. He thinks about you all the time, even when it doesn't feel like it.
- Jesus knows what to do.

Frustrated With God

I really don't have words today. I am incredibly frustrated with life right now. I don't understand what is happening. Nothing seems to play in our favor. I know God is moving, but right now I am frustrated with Him. There, I said it. I'm frustrated with God. I don't know what He's up to and He doesn't seem to be showing too much of His hand. Doors just seems to be closing. There is a glimmer of hope and then the door slams shut. Thankfully, God is big enough to handle my frustration.  Thankfully, God knows me well enough to know what I need and when I need it. Right now, I am struggling to see that providence in our current situation. I'm praying He shows me His will very soon, because I'm growing weary of the battle.

The Year of Almost

This has been the Year of Almost for me. It seems that every time I get to a spot where things look promising, there is a disappointment. I get almost to the top of the mountain and then I'll stumble downward. I start seeing the silver lining and then the clouds begin to backfill. I don't know what this is about.  The last time a similar situation happened with so many almosts, I was a Senior in high school. I don't care to repeat that now 20 years down the road. I'm trying to glean from this experience something even deeper than I did at 18. I haven't gotten to that thought yet, but that's what I've been talking to God about.  I'm hoping it's not the next lesson in pride or control, but it very well may be.  Humbling experiences and out of control moments seem to be around every corner these days.  I continue to cling to Jesus and let Him take me through. I'm assured I will eventually reach the mountain top, it just might take a little longer than I thought.

Under the Weather

Feeling a bit under the weather today.  I'll be back online tomorrow.  Sorry y'all.

One of My Favorites

Romans 8:31-39 What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all--how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died--more than that, who was raised to life--is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: "For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered." No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Psalm 42

Psalm 42: 1-6 As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God? My tears have been my food day and night, while men say to me all day long, "Where is your God?" These things I remember as I pour out my soul; how I used to go with the multitude, leading the procession to the house of God, with shouts of joy and thanksgiving among the festive throng. Why are you down cast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.

The Living Word

Matthew 10:39 Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.

I read all of chapter 10 today. It was a good read and something I need. Jesus tells his disciples about persecution and following him. He reminds them that they are with God and have no need to be afraid. Honestly, the best part about reading this passage was that I felt the living Word.  Something about just simply reading the chapter made my soul feel whole.  There were lots of powerful statements by Jesus and many good teachings, but the truth is in the Word itself.  The Bible speaks to our souls if we will open our hearts and allow Him in. I encourage you to take time to read some scripture in the next few days.  As a matter of fact, over this Labor Day weekend, all I'm going to post are scriptures.  Enjoy the your long weekend and make some time with Jesus.

An Air of Activity

I'm having an overall feeling of not knowing what's coming and it's making me very excited. Typically I would be in a bit of a panic, but not this time. I have no clue what's coming and I don't know when, but I just have a feeling it's something great. There seem to be so many things in the works and God is detailing each of them so beautifully.  He is molding hearts and building relationships. He's opening doors and closing them. There is just an air of activity and it's invigorating. I'm trying to stay focused on Him and not get distracted. I love how God knows us so well that He knows exactly what we need to keep pushing forward.  He knows what draws us near and He knows what transforms our hearts. You know I love anticipation, and this is a big ol' heapin' helpin' of it.  Go, God, Go!

Slow Down

I'm noticing that once a week I feel the need to just sit with Jesus. I don't want to pray or read my Bible or listen to music or think deep thoughts. I just want to sit with Him. I'm pretty sure this desire is the Spirit in me saying, "Slow down and just be still." I'm following His leading.

The Hurt Is Real

I'm just going to come out and say it, I'm having a rough go right now.  I have been on an emotional roller coaster of major highs and massive lows. I get beautiful glimpses of glory and on the heels, a horrific understanding of hurt. I'm giving God all of it and trying to remember who I am in Him, but it's hard at times.  The hurt is real. How can I be in a place I find such joy and be getting wounded? What is the meaning of that? The truth is, when we finally come to a place of deeper understanding of who we are in Christ and how to live in Christ, we will find ourselves being attacked by evil. My prayer for you, if you are finding yourself in this place, is that God would bind the evil one and continue to deepen your joy. Who am I kidding? This is my prayer for myself right now.  I feel a bit like a psalmist. Take heart! If you're being attacked, you're relationship with Jesus is probably in a really good spot.  Keep it up, my brothers and sisters in Christ!

Nothing Better

It is amazing how life-giving moments can be when you are used by God for others. When I am in the most uncomfortable place, God decides to lob in a whopper and I am blown away by His grace and provision. I'm almost to the point that I feel dumb about it.  Why did I question? Why was a I whiny? Why did I think it wasn't fair? Then God shows me and I'm jerked back to humility. Dad spoke of each of us being on the planet for one person, maybe more for some of us. The moments when God gives you the glimpse of that person is breathtaking and humbling. I am at a loss for words a bit today, so I'm hoping this makes sense as I type it. My heart is so full and my soul is at peace. Ah, to be an instrument of the Creator of the universe...there is nothing better. May you get a glimpse of that one for whom you are here. There may be many, but I pray you see at least one. It is powerful.

Grace or Criticism?

Sometimes we have the opportunity to show grace or be critical.  We might even have the opportunity to be critical and it's merited. When that happens to you, what is your go to?  Are you the type of person who extends grace to all, even when it's unmerited, or are you critical of others because you can be? This is a hard question for me to answer. I would like to think that I extend grace to everyone. I mean, after all, God has mercy on me in my imperfect state. Unfortunately, I know I don't always extend grace. I know I can be critical at times, mostly when it comes to an issue of control.  God is challenging me with this. I've been grasping to take back control of things I had once turned over to Him. I'm critical of others who don't "control" things like I would. It's super unhealthy. God's working on me. Please don't be critical of me, but rather extend me grace. I'm trying to do the same. My heart change is not in my control. Thankfully, God's got it.

A Humble Spirit

Father, thank you for your guidance and mercy. I pray that your love will radiate through me to those around me.  I pray that others will see you first, always.  Keep my spirit humble and my heart kind. Make my soul soft and caring, that I will listen.  Be ever-present. Your will be done and the may you receive all of the glory. Amen.

With Me Always

These last two weeks have been a transition time for me.  I headed back to work to a new school, but in a familiar position. I have had new people to get to know, new tools to use, and new ways of doing and thinking. If you know me, you know I like change, so that's not been so difficult. But just because I like change doesn't make it easy. As a matter of fact, one of the hardest parts of this change for me is that I had to leave people.  I keep in contact, but the truth of the matter is, I miss them daily. These are the times when I am very aware of the constancy of my relationship with Jesus.  He is with me always. He is why I am able to make the change, leaving familiar things and people and move forward. I'm not paralyzed. Even when the change is hard and uncomfortable, I am able to rest in the familiar arms of Jesus knowing I am loved, cared for, and understood. I'm gaining a clearer understanding of why it is so important for me to tend my relationship with Christ and spend as much time with Him as I possibly can.  He knows me best and He is the only one who is with me always.

Not About Performance

Today I'm grateful that God's love for me is not based on my performance. It is very freeing knowing that I am loved unconditionally. God does not put my good deeds on one side of the scale and my bad deeds on the other. I don't have to 'hope' I've been good enough to get into Heaven or that my good deeds have outweighed my bad. Jesus' death on the cross has paid the penalty for my bad. I can live in Him knowing that I am loved by God undoubtedly and I will be in Heaven with Him for eternity. And that's just the beginning of what God's unconditional love does for me. :-)

When God Is Silent

I have sat for almost 30 minutes and have no coherent thoughts to write about.  Some days you just come up dry.  It doesn't mean that the time I spent seeking God wasn't worth it or wasn't valuable.   It also doesn't mean that God doesn't care or is upset with me.  It simply means God knows when my heart is ready to receive His word and when it isn't. Sometimes the best thing for me is just to spend the quiet time with God, seeking Him, and giving Him my attention. I'm not concerned about His silence. I'm glad I had the time with Him.  We'll see what tomorrow brings.

God's Got This

I've had a couple of things this week that have made my heart skip a little, in a good way. I've grown majorly careful about getting my hopes up because life hasn't been super kind. For some reason though, I can't seem to get rid of my hope completely. I guess that's a good thing. I have learned how faithful God is when the road doesn't seem to "rise to meet me". When things start looking hopeful and I start to get excited, God reminds me that it's okay to allow my hope to rise because He was, is, and will be faithful in all circumstances. What does His faithfulness look like? It is comfort in sadness. It is peace that passes understanding. It is joy in sorrow. It is hope in tragedy. It is rejoicing in all circumstances. His grace carries me through any and every situation.

Cloudy Brain

I don't have much running through my mind today. Well actually there is a ton running through my mind and maybe that's the bigger issue. Sometimes my mind gets so full it feels numb and nothing seems to make sense or have meaning.  I know you know what I'm talking about. In those moments, I have learned to quiet myself, find a quiet spot, stop all the thoughts by focusing solely on Jesus.  I picture his feet on the throne as if I'm kneeling in front of Him.  As my mind begins to wander, I say His name, Jesus. I spend anywhere from a minute to many minutes in this spot, just focusing on Jesus. This helps my mind recenter and even get rid of thoughts that were just clouding my brain.  Things seem to make better sense and I can make meaning of more information from all realms after I do this. It's worth a try if you've never attempted. :-)

How Can I Help?

How do you help someone who is struggling? Words don't seem to work. Hugs seem trite. Wisdom is not comforting. So what do we have to offer? In my personal experience during my own times of struggle, the best thing was the spend time alone with Jesus and to have Jesus present through my friends and family.  No fancy words, no words of wisdom, no hugs (although for me, I'm not a hugger anyway)...it was just their presence and His. We know people hurt with us.  We know they feel bad for the situation too. We know they would take away if they could. We know all of the better things that are coming. We don't need reminders. We need to be in the presence of Jesus in communion with one another.  That's when true healing begins...in the presence of Jesus.

Focused

Lord you are all knowing.  You have brought me to this very spot for a very specific purpose.  Give me the eyes to see, the ears to hear, and the heart to respond to your voice.  Do not let me be caught up in the things that don't matter.  Let me be focused on you in all things.  Thank you for who you are. Amen.

The Main Attraction

I'm pondering the idea of the circle of impact. Initially I was thinking we need to be sure that we have a ripple effect and let our lives make a mighty impact. But then I thought about the person who spends his/her time quietly alone with God, impacting the few people who may care for him/her or visit him/her. Are either of these lives more valuable than the other? No. So do I mean that we shouldn't care about sharing Jesus. Not at all. The insight I'm taking from this is do whatever it is you are called to do by Jesus.  If that's to father a nation, then do it.  If it's to give your last two coins to Jesus, then do it. This life is not about our impact, but rather our relationship with Jesus. We get caught up in wanting to make it about how big our churches get, or how many people like our post, or  what our altar call count is, which is a distraction from the main attraction...Jesus. Live life for Jesus and let Him make an impact in, around, and through you however and to whomever he chooses.  Make life about Jesus and you will have an impact.

Keep Seeking

It has been a difficult couple of weeks for me, emotionally and spiritually. I've had lots of questions and apprehension. So what do I do? I go to Jesus and I go to my spiritual mentors. As soon as I notice I'm feeling a little "off", I text my mentor people and ask them to start praying. I give them specifics about what I'm seeing and feeling and ask them to intercede on my behalf. Then I begin a very diligent prayer pattern and 'eyes open' lifestyle. God has been faithful and revealed to me, through my mentors and my journey, new insights into His calling for me. I have been overwhelmed by His generosity in casting the vision and clearing my sight to see His it. There is a reason behind all that we think, feel, do, and experience. The key is to seek the One who is sovereign and omniscient, for He will shine light in the darkness. Keep seeking Jesus!

Quality Time With Jesus

We are so important for one another.  I am an ambivert, meaning I go back and forth between being and extrovert and an introvert. I get my energy from being alone, not being with others.  However, quality time is one of my strongest love languages.  Being with people is hard for me, and I prefer to do it one or two at a time when I do get together with others.  All of that said, we need each other.  We need our relationships and conversations to help us along the journey.  I find that I gain so much when I spend time with someone I love.  I am rejuvenated and energized by the personal interaction. I find the same to be true when I spend time with Jesus.  It seems harder because He doesn't seem to have a dialogue with us.  In reality, we don't know how to have a dialogue with Him.  It takes time to get to know Jesus well enough that you can sit quietly, listen, and know when He is speaking to you.  It is hard to give him as much time as that relationship really needs.  We are in a society of quick relationships through social media and texting.  My challenge is to make the time it takes to get to know Jesus, so that I can have personal interactions with him and be rejuvenated and energized through my quality time with him.  I will still spend time with my friends and family, of course, but I need to spend more time with Jesus.